Lot 48: April 2016

April 29, 2016

i can't write this post without crying

guys, i'm sad.

yet another sister is moving.

it's weird.  you spend your life sharing a home, lives, fighting over clothes and chores and such.  and then one day, you look around and all your sisters, the pieces of yourself are spread out all over the country.  and you don't live in that house together anymore.  nobody does.  just mom and dad do.

the youngest of 3 sisters, my oldest sister went to college when i was 12, and then the rest left in quick succession.  by the time i went to college, i had a sister in oxford, england, washington dc, and provo, utah.  we were all spread out.

year 14-15 we all lived in the same city again.  and it was wonderful.  but now, once again, all my sisters are leaving.  

this sister of mine, the sister closest to me in age, is on is making the selfish decision to move to arizona on saturday so her husband can go to grad school.  sel-fish. with emphasis.  the thought makes me do kim kardashian ugly cry.  oh just kidding, that's what i am doing. 


this era of us sisters living close together is coming to an end.  i don't think she will come back.  and i honestly don't know how much longer taran and i will be here.  who knows?? 

^^when she and her fiance now husband let me come with them to their halloween party.  they were mr and mrs smith.  i was serena vanderwoodsen. best costume i've ever had.^^

^^her wedding^^

of course we had our fights growing up.  she liked to pretend fight me.  like punch me within an inch of my face.  i hated it.  it would make me cry.  but i am just glad we didn't do anything like this to each other, although this article accurately depicts sisterhood.

everybody said we looked exactly alike, especially in high school.  she was a senior when i was a sophomore, and she had brown hair and mine was blonde.  people would walk up to me and say "oh my gosh! rachelle! hi! you dyed your hair!!" this happened all the time.  it was so annoying.  'NO I'M NOT MY SISTER I'M MY OWN PERSON' 15 year old me would think.  'don't clump me my sister!' i did think it try to persuade her multiple times to switch places with me in life for a day at school to see if our teachers would notice.  she wasn't such a fan of that idea.

but now i would kill to have someone associate me with her.  or think i was her.  rachelle is cheerful, positive, and flat out amazing.  i admire her as much as people with no direction in life admire oprah.  she is a rockstar mom.  she has two gorgeous and sassy little girls.  she frequently holds one on each hip while talking on the phone and carrying groceries into the car.  when i ask her for help in these situations, she always says no. #rockstar

she was a competitive gymnast growing up.  she is fearless.  flying across the bars and doing backflips on a beam 4 inches wide.  we went to gymnastics together, and i would be trying to do a cartwheel on the beam that was on the floor, and i would be so scared i would just start crying.  while looking over at my sister.  who was doing multiple backflips.  on a beam that was 4 inches wide.  above the ground. #warrior

i came to visit her at college my freshman year of college once, and it was during halloween and i finally convinced her to swap places with me.  i went to the halloween party with her friends, and everyone thought i was her.  it was freaking awesome.

rachelle, i am going to miss you so, so much.  i know that you aren't too far yet,  just back home, but come august you will be very far away.  too far. but we will always be sisters and thank goodness for planes.

your little sister

April 28, 2016

things I hate more than cheese

really, i just have no creativity when it comes to blogging lately and have just been stealing other people's ideas.  i am copying sarah's post on things she hates more than april fools day.  thanks for the idea, sarah!

i've mentioned many times before that i really, really hate cheese.  i remember liking it when i was little, but in elementary school, like in 3rd grade or something, it just changed and i just didn't like it anymore.  i hate the texture, the taste, the smell, everything about it.  i can taste it even if there is a hint of cheese in something.  it's a hard life guys, cheese is in everything. it's hard to order at restaurants a lot of the time. #thestruggleisreal. but, with copying sarah's idea, there are things i hate more than cheese.

  • being cold 
  • traffic
  • kristen stewart
  • big bang theory
  • cats
  • people who talk on the phone in a library
  • no food in the fridge 
  • a broken iphone
  • pranks
  • being so busy i don't even have time to read blogs
  • when keeping with the kardashians is on break and there are no new episodes to watch
  • camping
  • summer
  • no cuddle time with the husband
  • when my niecephews think they are too cool to play with me
  • SPORTS(sorry sarah)
  • when no one reads my blog
  • via GIPHY
  • unemployment
  • people ranting on facebook
  • early mornings
  • delayed flights
  • people who constantly say "uh huh" and "mmm" while listening to someone talk.  it's infuriating.
  • when people walk slowly
  • when people drive slowly
maybe this is just a list of pet peeves? hmmmmm...

if you see me, don't look at me weird when i order pizza with no cheese. 

April 27, 2016

single dayzzz

single daaaaayzzzzz.
as i get more and more excited for my best friend patrisha to move here in august, i have been thinking about how much i had with my friends when i was single.  friendships change once you are married.  you don't go out all dressed up to get boys, really when i go out with friends again, i am in jeans and a sweatshirt with no makeup on because whynot.  i am there to impress no one.  

looking back in time is funny because when i was single, there were times i detested it and all i wanted was to be married, and other times when i was having so much fun being free and single and attached to no one.  i have no desire to be single, i don't miss be single. i like being married. but patrisha and i have never lived in the same city before while i was married, or have had a lot of time together while i have been married.  so it will be different. 

so let me share my favorite story from when i was single, yeah? good fun. 

when i was on my study abroad in london, my friends and i went to a lot of clubs to go dancing. it was so much fun and my favorite memories of college. and london, for that matter.  

these pictures are from the night that was the best.  i found a place to go dancing, but when we got there, it was for middle aged people and had a huge cover charge, so we went walking to find another place.  i spotted this girl who looked like she was dressed up to go clubbing like we were, so i said "guys! she's dressed cute and looks like she knows where to go! let's follow her!" so we did and totally freaked her out.  we kept a good distance, but she kept turning around and eventually ran into this club near covent garden.  we followed her in and she just bee lined for her friends and kept looking at us.  i didn't care.  she had led us into exactly what we were looking for.

my friends and i came up with signals to give each other when guys would start creepin' so we had each other's backs.  we hung out with a group of guys who had just joined the army or whatever it is over there and they were on break or something from training.  they were wearing white shirts and had sharpies that they were trying to get everyone to sign before they left. 

we danced so hard that night, we laughed so hard that night, lived so hard that night.  it was one of the best nights of my life.  i miss those days of getting dressed up and going out to dance to your heart's content.  i asked taran if we could go dancing this weekend, so hopefully we will make it happen.  sometimes you just need to dance it out!!

when i was single, there were times i was so focused on having a boyfriend that i didn't stop to appreciate all the things i could do without being attached to anyone.  there were some periods where i did appreciate it and loved it, like london and when i lived in LA, but the rest of the time i mostly moped.  lame.

being single, free, attached is fun.  carefree.  appreciate it.  get dressed up and go out just for fun, with no other purpose than to have fun, instead of getting guys numbers.  the phrase "stop looking and that's when he'll find you" is so true, i think.  when you are happy with yourself, your life, and your independence is when you meet 'the one.'

so live it up!! love yourself and stop worrying. just have fun.  and if you don't know what club to go to, follow a girl that's dressed cute and she will lead you to the best club.

April 25, 2016


i've been thinking about nicknames lately.  you get a name when you are born, but that isn't always what you are called.  you might choose a different name, your friends might choose a different name for you, or you might become a rapper and choose a name that makes no sense at all.  

when i was born, i didn't open my left eye for a week.  and i think even after that i would close only that eye a lot.  my parents called me winkie.  i've seen baby pictures of me where i am being held in my mom's arms, and i'm just lying there with one eye shut, looking at the camera like, "hey, wasssup, how you doin....."

i haven't been called winkie in a really long time.  names my family sometimes calls me lu, and when my dad is a really good mood, if he is walking by me, he will say in a sing song voice "la la la la la la!!!!"

im not really winning in the nickname department when it comes to really cool nicknames. or aliases. whatever you want to call it. rappers, hip hop, music producers have it down with naming themselves crazy stuff:

koko laroo
major lazer
50 cent
ll cool j

they sound awesome but confusing. how did they come up with this stuff? how did they choose this? curtis james jackson, how did you get 50 cent out of that name? james todd smith, i am looking at you too.  granted, if you two were trying to rap with those names, i would definitely laugh at you. ll cool j and 50 cent sound much better.

so to gain street cred, here are nicknames i propose for myself:

100 cent
tt warm k
velvet rancher
spy loroya
lazer pointer

i think these are all simply brilliant names and would do wonders for my street cred. which one should i choose, do you think?

how about you? what are your nicknames?

April 19, 2016

thoughts from my iphone

all bloggers do this, right? we jot down blog post ideas when inspiration strikes us before we forget it on our phones, kate spade notebooks, or whatever is really trendy that i am out of the loop of? i do it! but they often are ideas that can't be flushed out out into an entire blog post, or maybe they could and i am just not that good a writer, i don't know.  but i did a post back in nov 2014 where i posted all the ideas i wrote down in one big post i thought i should do it again!

^^horrible graphic but i really am not a graphic designer, just terrible. this is one of the worst i have ever made.  apologies. ^^

- when does it become our business to interfere with other peoples' marriages?  do you tell the wife that you know her husband is cheating? this situation happened to one of our close friends and it got taran and i thinking.  it is such a difficult decision!  such a difficult decision that they made a movie about it, the dilemma, one of those movies that you would watch on plane to pass the time or if you wanted a chill friday night.  it's funny but not the greatest movie ever made, but the story holds up.  what would you do?? tell the spouse you know the other spouse is cheating? or stay out of it? or just stalk the mister/mistress to get all the facts like vince vaughn did?

- when does something very sad or horrific affect you? when is it your business? if it's your sister? your friend? your friend's daughter? where is the line? it's tricky isn't it?

- why do people always say "have a happy easter from our family to ours" or "have a merry Christmas and a very joyous New Year from our family to ours" instead of simply saying "have a happy tuesday, from me to you.!"  i guess neither is sincere, right, because you put out Christmas cards to show off how well you're doing in your life and how awesome your body is this year, and you never really mean "have a great day!" but i really wish those simple phrases were true. those "take cares" and "have a good day" aren't sincere anymore.  i feel like we just go through life not really watching out or looking out for those around us, those who need us.  let's make an effort to keep our ears and hearts open and make those phrases we say on a daily basis meaningful.  let's make it a goal.  brighten someone's day everyday!

- what if the blogging community was a college campus?  and we all got to see each other and hang out?  do you think there would be clicks or do you think it be more like Google campus where brilliant minds share ideas and enjoy each other's intellect? one thing is for sure.  we would all get really fat because all the food is free OR we would never eat because there is food everywhere and we would be too busy taking pictures of it to eat.

- i delay finishing tv shows.  majorly delay.  when a tv series ends, to me it's like losing a friend.  isn't that pathetic? that's just sad. there are some series' that i binge watched that i still haven't finished because i know i will be super upset when it ends.  like i haven't finished seinfeld, i just can't imagine that brilliant show being over.  as that show was popular when i was a pre-teen, i obviously didn't watch it in it's prime.  so i blew through it when it was released onto hulu.  i finished it up until the finale in sept and still haven't pulled the plug and watched the finale.  #pathetic.

- this is from a verrry long time ago, but i read in the news about people in thailand using the three finger hunger games gesture to protest against the government.  the gov took the hunger games out of theaters and when then people protested outside the theater using the three finger gesture.  they were detained.  but it's still awesome and amazing how one movie can invoke such a stir and wave across society.  in real life.  that series isn't just a book or movie.  it has translated to real life.  this is why i love entertainment. 

- I'm really glad I decided to not be an actress.  i just could not handle all that publcity.  paparazzi jumping out everywhere, the press taking every minisclue detail of my life and make one huge story out of  nothing.  it would drive me crazy.  not that by just saying "i'm so glad i didn't become an actress" would instantly shoot me to stardom, let's be real, guys.  but honestly, how do celebs put up with that?  have you ever fantasized about your face being on billboards and big movie screens or performing in front of 10,000 of your closest "friends" screaming your name? i have, for sure!! and that part would be amazing.  but the foot work to get there sounds exhausting.  even just talking about it makes me exhausted.

April 15, 2016


i haven't done a currently sesh in a long time so i thought it would be a good time to catch up!

stressing.... about a lot a lot of things that i don't think its wise to share with the blogging world. and also, i noticed that i posted a very personal post a long while back on my blog that was the most read post this month, and as i read it, i just thought 'oh no, honey, what were you thinking. you don't like sharing your business with other people.  what is wrong with you. you little lamb from years ago.' even just reading this makes me feel uncomfortable, it was just waaaay too personal, so i deleted it.  i just am not comfortable sharing personal things about my life. i guess at one point i obviously way, but not way.  maybe one day again.  but any positive thoughts you have, send my way! 

counting... my blessings.  i really am so blessing, sometimes i can't believe it.  i am always in awe of how the Lord has blest me and Taran and i thank Him everyday for the things he has given us.  we have beautiful lives.  we have a nice, cozy apartment, we always somehow manage to pay our bills, we are able to have lots of time together, we have no mind blowing issues that are rocking our world.  i really have no complaints.  two peas in a pod we are.  usually in sync.  i would say always, but come on people, this is a marriage. 

wishing... that i was better at reading books. i check books out from the library and never seen to crack them open.  tv is always so much more satisfying and i hate that about myself! reading books is such an intellectual act, and you learn so much from them.  and i wish i had more discipline to crack them open.  and when i do manage to crack them open, i usually never finish them. i have a short attention span, thanks to tv.  ugh!! 

also wishing.... that i had a book club i could join.  i think that would be a really fun way to make friends! 

proud of... taran who started actual engineer design as pick up jobs on the side from his full time job.  he is doing so great and is learning so much.  i am so proud of him! i heard him talking to a client the other day and i swear, it was like listening to some kind of nerd, foreign language that made so thoroughly no sense that i could have sworn he was just making up words because i had never in my life heard any of those terms before.  it was crazy.  because he is crazy smart.  and i did not get a 7 year degree in engineering so i understandably have zero idea what he was saying.  

excited about... memorial day weekend. like, really excited.  the family, all 14 of us, will all gather at home, our hometown, the dear sweet house we grew up in that my parents are trying to sell (cue sobs) for a fun filled, sun filled, tubing on the boat at the lake, jumping off cliffs and up to my neck in sweet/you're-cute-but-are-testing-my-patience babies for an extended weekend i will get to see my sister that i haven't seen in almost a year! 

also excited about.... that my bff patrisha is moving here in august to go to pharmacy school! i seriously cannot WAIT! 

tired from.... being tired.  i have not been sleeping well lately.  i blame the stress.  but it is getting really annoying. 

listening to... hailiee steinfeld.  i got hooked on her after i heard one of her songs playing in a movie i saw.  i think she is one of my new favorite artists. she rocks hard.

watching.... everything. i blew through  baby daddy, bowfinger and a bunch else.  i will do my netflix finds post on it later. see netflix posts 1, 2 and 3.

happy weekend!! 

April 12, 2016

it looked better on the rack

*beware, this post is a bit of a rant.*

i would consider myself a low maintenance girly girl. the kind who wears converse sneakers and jeans but also loves a pair of 4 inch heels and getting all dressed up now and then.

i feel a stereotype with women is they love to go shopping.  "retail therapy." women bond over trying on clothes in dressing rooms and modeling them in the mirror and asking each other advice.  women walk into a clothing department and see what i could only compare to a candy store.  options, options, options.  #firstworldproblems.  

i am not one of the those people.  i don't remember a time when i ever liked shopping.  shopping has always been a chore for me. i dread it, never enjoy myself, and do it as fast as i can. here are the reasons why i dislike this anthropoligeic activity:

1) the looking 
looking through all the racks and trying to find something that a) is in your size and b) you actually like.  i always find it incredibly difficult for those two categories to come together.  the process usually goes "oh look! this shirt is so cute! but oh no! it's way too small......" then the hunt begins for the exact shirt in the appropriate size.

also when i go shopping  as i walk into those beautifully crafted white pillars (wherever you shop for clothes, it's always white somehow, a calming color. unless you're in target, then it's red, buy! buy!  buy!)

2) the trying on
i'm sure every one has this problem.  you find a shirt or pants, or shorts or whatever and take it into the dressing room to try on only to find that it looked waaay better on the rack. but it was so cute! that is one of the most disappointing feat of shopping.

but really, i have never once tried one clothes in a dressing room and thought to myself  'dang, i look goooood.  i love my body.  why aren't i model.  i should go audition for america's next top model right now.'  even if i like my body at that moment in time, the second i enter a dressing room, all self esteem goes out the window.  shirts are never long enough on my torso and loose enough on my boobs at the same time.  its very awkward.  and don't even get me started on pants.  and my legs are so muscly that every time i try on a dress i look like i escape field hockey practice.

i also hate the task of taking clothes on and off, on and off, on and off.  i find it incredibly annoying.  

3) sticking to your budget your planned beforehand and eliminating things you liked to not overspend.

if i do happen to find things that i do like on me that are actually cute, then i have to begin the process of eliminating clothes so i can stick to my budget.  if i somehow lucked out and found a lot of clothes that i really liked, eliminating is the hardest.  'well i do have a lot of blue shirts.  this shirt is pink.  i don't have a lot of pink shirts.  and so on and so on.  it's like you found some new friends and you want to hang out with all of them and take them to a party but you can only get a certain number of friends in.  tough. decisions. 

4) the amount of time it takes

given how much i dislike this task, i really don't like spending time doing it.  i find it boring and there are always a thousand other things that i would rather be doing than shopping. i try to get it done in a half hour.  even if i need to practically replace my entire wardrobe, i give myself only a half hour.  get it done as fast as possible. warp speed. i get really bossy with the sales people and bark "get this in an 8!" fast fast fast!! once i'm done, it's like being done with a chore that your mom forced you to do that you dreaded doing but you couldn't go play with your friends until it was done.  slap those hands together, you're finished!


i guess there is some thing i understand could be fun about shopping.  it's like taking home a new puppy.  i like shopping with friends for friends.  i like giving my friends advice on their clothes when they try things on and helping them pick things out.  i just don't like picking things out for myself.

does anybody feel the same way?