i confess..... that i don't know how celebrities do it. when i was flying back from my san fransisco trip i was so tired i wanted to cry. we had walked practically for 3 days and seen so much i was so beyond exhausted. i read the latest cosmo issue on the plane where gwen stefani gave an interview. the interview started out by the reporter saying she was running on 4 hours of sleep and had a cold but you would never know because she was still bubbly and excited to do the photoshoot. i thought about how exhausted i was and thought to myself, "how do celebrities live like that?" i am sure that is a normal day for her.
i confess.... that i am on this huge kick of reading a bunch of celebrity memoirs. my favorite one so far has been amy poehler's "yes please." she is so honest and really hit me right in my soul. i liked it so much i bought it because i want to read certain parts again and again. the problem with her book, though, is that she was trying to be funny 70% of the time and it got kind of exhausting. i just wanted to hear about her life, what she thinks and feels, and for the most part she did. she also talked a lot about how hard it was to write a book (and her book is looooooooong) and that made me feel like 'okaaay...... i'm sorry? do you want me to apologize to you?'
i confess..... that i have this weird thing where if i go somewhere, on vacation, road trip, even to the pool, if i don't use everything i bring, i freak out. i have this obsession where i have to use everything i brought with me. everything. it's weird and also annoying because i get oddly sad when a book i brought to read on vacation hasn't even been cracked open.
i confess..... that the oscars are weird. all the movies that are nominated usually aren't movies that are popular. when the nominees are announced, 99% of the movies i haven't even heard of. just in case you don't know, the studio submits their film to the Academy Awards people and then everyone in that club vote. so it is more like a popularity contest, studios campaign for it. in hollywood, there is a weekly magazine called the hollywood reporter and around award season, it is filled with ads with a big title at the top that say "for your consideration... birdman for best picture" and so on and so on. it really is just a popularity contest. it's weird. and seems kind of pointless to me. it sounds like high school. or a political race.
i confess.... that when i am having a really hard day i know my mood will change drastically if i could just hold a squishy, sweet baby. like my niece of nephew. or play with an older kid, like my toddler nieces and nephews. they calm me and relax me. they make me feel safe and warm.
i confess..... that i am 80% done with courtney robertson's tell all bachelor book and it was a really fun read, i haven't been able to put it down. the show sounds like prison. they get "yard time" where they can exercise, they don't get a tv, magazines, books, nothing. they just sit there for days until they get called on a date. i didn't watch ben flajnik's season so i didn't know who she was so i kept looking up pictures of the other contestants she talked about so i could picture it, and i know she was portrayed as a villain, and in her book, she is very open and honest and really is a villain kind of person. i didn't particularly like her but i really didn't like ben in the book. he was a complete and total *$&#( he was such a jerk to her, i can't believe she held on that long.
i confess.... that the style section and beauty sections of cosmo really really stress me out. i don't know what mascara to buy!! what if i don't look good in what is deemed spring's hottest look? that's why i like elle because even though it is a fashion magazine through and through, they have amazing writers and reporters that write incredible stories about incredible people. i feel smart when i read it.
i confess..... that i fear i will lose myself as a person when i become a mother. that i won't be lauren anymore. that i won't get to be myself, i'll just be a mom and not a human. that is why i want to travel and get everything on my bucket list done before we have kids, because i feel like once i become a mother, i won't get to have a life or be a person. is that weird?
whew! that was a lot of confessions! happy humpday!