Lot 48: my biggest fear

October 20, 2014

my biggest fear

today's #blogtober14 challenge is to reveal my biggest fear.  and it's cliche.  


my greatest fear is that my husband will die before me.  i couldn't live without him.  i love him more than i thought it possible and i would not be able to live without him.  i couldn't.  i wouldn't be able to.  he is my air, my breathe, my safe place.  i need him.  i don't  want to live in a world without him in it.  i couldn't.  it would be impossible.  

okay, now that i have cheesed it out, i'll list other fears. 

  • my dad's knee replacement.  my dad is getting his knee replaced TODAY and i am really really scared for him.  i was crying about it a lot yesterday.  knee replacement surgery is such serious surgery and he had me go to a class about his surgey and what to plan for it really scared me.  please send good thoughts and prayers his way. and mine too.  because i am not doing too well over here.
  • my loved ones getting hurt.  i have this fantasy where i have like really cool spy equipment that notifies me when someone is intruding on one of my sister's houses.  and the spy equipment wakes me up in the night and notifies me there is an intruder at my sister's house.  this is actually a real fear for me because my brother-in-law used to be a defense attorney.  like when someone can't afford a lawyer and the cops say, "if you can't afford a lawyer one will be appointed for you." that lawyer was my brother-in-law, for the county.  he only did misdemeanors but i was always worried that some crack head that didn't get off scott free comes to his house to hurt him and his family and i take that crack head DOWN.  
  • heights.  i can't even watch someone climb high.  my palms get sweaty and i just can't even.
  • the ocean.  TERRIFIED of the ocean.  my parents surprised us with a trip to hawaii when i was 10 and i  wouldn't go in past my waist. i hate snorkeling.  i hate deep waters.  also on that trip to hawaii, we took a boat to a turtle place where there were a lot of ENORMOUS turtles and the water was really murky and all my sisters were putting their goggles on and looking at the turtles but i was convinced that i would look into the water and a shark would be staring at me with a big grin like bruce from finding nemo.  i finally looked and like 20 feet below me were turtles that were literally 10 feet in diameter.  and no shark stared at me. 
okay.  i can't talk about my fears anymore. mostly because my space bar is broken and it is really difficult to type.  also, my c key is sticking.  i'm outtttie.  also, go win a kate spade watch. 


Helene in Between Blogtober


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6 comments:

  1. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!! I have always told Chris that I have to "go" first. I don't know that I would be able to handle the grief if Chris passed before me. Everything would be just so empty.

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  2. UGh! That's a huge fear of mine too. I want to go first!!! and then haunt him...okay just kidding, but I can't imagine beying without him.

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  3. I am totally freaked out at the idea of my loved ones getting sick, hurt, or dying. Terrified.

    And my favorite blog to read is Lot 48! :-)

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  4. Yes, yes, yes, and yes! All huge fears of mine as well except the knee replacement as my dad isn't there yet. ;)

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  5. Those are totally normal fears! Here's to you and your husband living long, full lives! :)

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  6. I'm 100% claustrophobic. Cannot do the closed spaces. I learned this when I tried to go in one of those tube water slides... can't do it. I'll take the heights and ocean for you if you can take small spaces for me.
    Love the random blog comment idea... I have a lot of faves though. you're one of them! <3

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