Lot 48: i just can't do it!

April 14, 2014

i just can't do it!

you know how there are things that you would just LOVE to be able to do? they look like so much fun! and you want to do them! but you juussssssssst can't seem to be able to! no matter how hard you try? well lets talk about it because this is a very serious subject that needs to be addressed.

whistle.  guys.  i just cannot whistle.  no matter how hard i try.  i can't do it.  i just end up spitting. it is embarrassing and everyone looks at me like i'm an idiot (maybe i am?). but whistling, guys.  its a struggle.

look good without makeup on.  my eyelashes are so blonde! i just can't do it! i look like a ghost! an albino ghost! luckily since acutane i don't have zits, but the eyelashes is what's a problem.  i just look sick and dying.

think on my feet.  there is a really really great story to go along with this. but it deserves its own blog post, so i'm not gonna tell. but i am horrible at thinking on my feet.  every time that i watch a tv show and a character gets in a bind and has to talk her way out of it, i try to predict what the character is going to do and nothing comes to mind.  i have so many tickets because i couldn't talk my out of them! somebody teach me!

play sports.  i am completely incapable of playing any sports.  i just kind of stand there if its baseball, i just kind of run around if its soccer, and if its football, i cover my head with my hands and run off the field screaming in fear.  golf? yeah, i almost drove a golf  cart into a lake. that deserves its own blog post too.

have a good comeback.  its like this episode of seinfeld.  i never think of a comeback until a few days later. and if i did go back to that guy and said "the jerkstore called, they're running out of you!" the guy would definitely have retorted with something better and i would have felt stupid and defeated. comebacks, man!
like cooking and grocery store shopping and clothes shopping and other things girls and good wives should do.  i don't like cooking or grocery shopping. i don't like shopping for clothes unless its with my mom because she is fun.  i really wish i liked cooking, it would make life so much easier and cheaper and i wouldn't feel like such a bad wife when my husband cooks for me. 

there are more im sure.  but i guess another thing i can't do is think of more things i can't do.




2 comments:

  1. I CAN'T WHISTLE EITHER. And girls who look good without makeup are liars.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. THANK YOU. nobody looks good without makeup! that is why tabloids make fun of "stars without makeup!"

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